Send Chuck to Iraq

[JohnM69SS]

Hey everyone,

My cousin is a Marine stationed in Iraq. Recently, Chuck Norris paid a visit to the base where she is stationed and he was a big hit. We got to talking and decided that it would be fun for me to send my Chuck Norris action figure over to Iraq so that he can do a tour of duty and kick some azz. "Chuck" arrived in Iraq last week and is already out on his first "mission" with some Public Affairs folks in the Marines.

I put together a website to document the tour of duty and to host the pictures of Chuck in Iraq as they come in.
The website is www.sendchucktoiraq.com (http://www.sendchucktoiraq.com)

There is more information about the project on the website, and plenty more photos to come. Chuck has only been there for a few days, so I only have one photo from Iraq thus far. Once he returns from his mission in Ramadi (later this week) I should get those pictures from my cousin and will post them on the site.

If you are interested is showing some support, you can post a message on the guestbook . The e-mail field is optional, so you do not need to fill it out of you are afraid of getting spammed.

I have had the Chuck Norris action figure on my desk for years. If someone gets unruly here at work, they would find their office randsacked and "Chuck" posed on their desk.

Hopefully, when this war is over, Chuck will come back and resume his post on my desk.

Thanks!

John

:patriot:

[jy211]

keep us updated...this should be funny.:thumbsup:

[speedshopmike]

1 Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too
bad he has never cried. Ever.

2 Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

3 Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are
trademarked names for his left and right legs.

4 The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

5 If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see
Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.

6 Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.

7 Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the
probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

8 Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.

9 Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with
ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.

10 In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World
Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and
those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever
gotten.

11 There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only
another fist.

12 Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot
broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart
while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.

13 Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that
sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.

14 Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire,
and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

15 The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck
Norris out. It failed miserably.

16 If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two
seconds 'till." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse
kicks you in the face.

17 Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

18 Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks
and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction
was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took
his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and
admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every
second Wednesday of the month.

19 There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck
Norris allows to live.

20 Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent
the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

21 Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a
game of tennis.

22 Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows
and the butter comes straight out.

23 When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and
includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack.
Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.

24 The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.

25 A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for
handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot
belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park
there.

26 Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will
be the Magnolia.

27 Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out
of a plane and punched the ground.

28 Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video
game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him
to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris
replied, "That's no glitch."

29 The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely
based on games of dodge ball Chuck Norris played in second grade.

30 Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his
finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

31 Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a
spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the
earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a
temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publicly claimed it
was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.

32 Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

33 Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks
aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by
historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

34 Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a
Chucktatorship.

35 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck
Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the
turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

36 Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like
Chuck Norris

37 Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg
uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how
quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

38 Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in forty-seven
seconds.

39 Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris
instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.

40 If you say Chuck Norris' name in Mongolia, the people there will
roundhouse kick you in his honor. Their kick will be followed by the
REAL roundhouse delivered by none other than Norris himself.

41 Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

42 Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving
multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in
this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public,
Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert
Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.

43 The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game
Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire
combined nations of the world in one turn.

44 In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris
could use to kill you, including the room itself.

45 Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

46 Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the
American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a
roundhouse kick to the face.

47 When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe,
and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

48 There are no weapons of mass destruction. Just Chuck Norris.

49 Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more
testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

50 Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the
gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other
three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to
Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All
three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.

51 Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.

[speedshopmike]

52 When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged. He
holds up the phone and money falls out.

53 Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell
him there was a stripper in it.

54 There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has
beaten to different shades of black and blue.

55 Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his
markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all
blood is dark red.

56 A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method
of execution in 16 states.

57 When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.

58 Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer
steroids. Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time
single-season home run king.

59 Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the
Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick)

60 Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks
through.

61 When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is
gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

62 How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck
Norris? ...All of it.

63 Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble
themselves out of fear.

64 In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even
larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be
"Norrisized".

65 Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

66 If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country
of Australia for 44 minutes.

67 The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck
Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in
blood and tears.

68 Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each
action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force
equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

69 Chuck Norris invented his own type of karate. It's called
Chuck-Will-Kill.

70 When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the
French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.

71 While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding
titanium.

72 Chuck Norris once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when
it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was
plagiarized from his autobiography.

73 When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When
Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.

74 Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women
in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."

75 Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris
to go around.

76 Chuck Norris doesn’t shave; he kicks himself in the face. The
only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.

77 For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For
Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.

78 When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You
will score a 1600.

79 Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire
spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

80 When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One
roundhouse kick to the face.

81 Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the
1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of
Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card
from the game UNO.

82 On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to
be thrown into the sun.

83 Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris.

84 Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris
throws down!

85 In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse
kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the
story of the universe.

86 Chuck Norris has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth.

87 Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water
with his own rage.

88 Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to
the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck
Norris"

89 Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

90 Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly
destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one
building.

91 If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you
will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.

92 Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin
and the other nine faint.

93 The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on
an island with Chuck Norris. there were no survivors and the pilot
episode tape has been burned.

94 Chuck Norris brings the noise AND the funk.

95 You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die
in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris
will find you and kill you.

96 Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

97 When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around
people. He walks through them

98 James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie
into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

99 Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

100 Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean
section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother’s womb.

101 Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

[JohnM69SS]

Someone from Public Affairs took the Chuck action figure on a "mission" in Ramadi, Iraq. Chuck returned to his home base in Fallujah yesterday and I received the photos today. I just updated the site.
If you get a chance, sign the guestbook

:woot:

thanks!

[4mm]

:rofl: That's some funny stuff!

[JohnM69SS]

Wow, it looks like this little project is picking up steam. On a slim chance, I sent an e-mail off to the folks at Chuck Norris, inc explaining what we were doing. I received an e-mail from them stating that they would forward this to the man himself (Mr. Norris) and see what he thought. He gave permission for my website to be linked from www.chucknorris.com. Here is the link:

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx?type=2

Be nice to me, I know Chuck Norris...

:hail:

[AAW]

Be nice to me, I know Chuck Norris...:hail:

:lol:
:thumbsup:

[XcYZ]

Be nice to me, I know Chuck Norris...

That's awesome, John! :woot:

[syborg tt]

Very cool

[speedshopmike]

hey marty,
how ya been?
-mike
(rockvillespeed on syty)

[syborg tt]

hey marty,
how ya been?
-mike
(rockvillespeed on syty)

doing good - glad to see you over here

[JohnM69SS]

Update:

I was contacted by the folks at the History / Military channel. They are interested in doing a segment on the Chuck action fogure "Tour of Duty" in an upcoming episode "My War Diary". I spoke with them on the phone at length, we will see what happens. Stay tuned!
:unibrow:

Here is a promo for the series:
http://dsc.discovery.com/beyond/player.html?bclid=70378978

[98ssnova]

That's awesome hope chuck kicks ass over there and good luck with Discovery

[Yenkostyle]

I thought I would send this one to you as well... We Know CHUCK all to well over here! ( I thought this went well with the action figure!) LOL

[JohnM69SS]

Pure sacrilege! Nobody is more badass than Chuck.. ha ha.

thanks, I love that pic...

:bow: