Steve Chryssos
03-25-2006, 09:41 AM
As further reinforcement for the fact that EVERYTHING should be hot rodded, I offer the following:
Poor little Phoebe, my Portuguese Water Dog developed a hematoma in her left ear. The vet operated on her while I was out of town. I came home to find the pooch bumbling around in this giant, one-size-fits-all cone. Of course, the purpose of that cone is to keep her from scratching her ear.
As a by-product, that cone also serves as a canine torture device. From the little plastic pointy things that dig into her neck, to the obscene proportions that caused her to bump into absolutely everything, it became clear to me--as a hot rodder--that something should be done. Tha ridiculous cone was the size of NASA radar dish. Something HAD to be done!
Their I stood, armed with a pair of sharp scissors, a tape gun and a Sharpie marker. The wife was understandably nervous. Mary had that look of horror before. She once came out to the garage to find me performing a "tail chop" on her brand new, perfectly good Ducati Monster. When she inquired, my response was: "Because stock sucks!"
With a trim here, some tape there and a few test fits, the cone now fits her perfectly. The pooch can even make her way up stairs without incident. And the Sharpie? Her cone is now custom lettered for that personalized touch.
Even the dog understands: Stock sux!
Poor little Phoebe, my Portuguese Water Dog developed a hematoma in her left ear. The vet operated on her while I was out of town. I came home to find the pooch bumbling around in this giant, one-size-fits-all cone. Of course, the purpose of that cone is to keep her from scratching her ear.
As a by-product, that cone also serves as a canine torture device. From the little plastic pointy things that dig into her neck, to the obscene proportions that caused her to bump into absolutely everything, it became clear to me--as a hot rodder--that something should be done. Tha ridiculous cone was the size of NASA radar dish. Something HAD to be done!
Their I stood, armed with a pair of sharp scissors, a tape gun and a Sharpie marker. The wife was understandably nervous. Mary had that look of horror before. She once came out to the garage to find me performing a "tail chop" on her brand new, perfectly good Ducati Monster. When she inquired, my response was: "Because stock sucks!"
With a trim here, some tape there and a few test fits, the cone now fits her perfectly. The pooch can even make her way up stairs without incident. And the Sharpie? Her cone is now custom lettered for that personalized touch.
Even the dog understands: Stock sux!