Ummgawa
09-29-2007, 09:26 AM
Two boys are playing football at this park in a small town in Alabama when one of the boys is suddenly attacked by a crazed Rottweiler.
Thinking quickly, the other boy takes a stick and shoves it under the dog's collar, twists it, and breaks the dog's neck, thus saving his friend.
A local sports reporter who was strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to interview the boy. He tells the boy he's going to write the story and says, "I'll title it 'Young Bama Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal.' "
"But I'm not a Bama fan," the little hero replies.
"Sorry, since we're in Alabama, I just assumed you were," says the reporter and he starts writing again.
He asks "How does 'Auburn Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack' sound?"
"I'm not an Auburn fan either," the boy says.
"Oh, I thought everyone in Alabama was either for the Tide or the Tigers. What team do you root for?" the reporter asks.
"I'm just here in Alabama visiting my cousin, I'm a Tennessee Vols fan," said the boy.
The reporter smiles, starts a new sheet in his notebook, and writes: "Little Redneck From Tennessee Kills Beloved Family Pet."
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A seven-year old boy was at the center of a Knox County courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible.
The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him.
After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.
After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the Child Welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the University of Tennessee Volunteer football team, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.
Thinking quickly, the other boy takes a stick and shoves it under the dog's collar, twists it, and breaks the dog's neck, thus saving his friend.
A local sports reporter who was strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to interview the boy. He tells the boy he's going to write the story and says, "I'll title it 'Young Bama Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal.' "
"But I'm not a Bama fan," the little hero replies.
"Sorry, since we're in Alabama, I just assumed you were," says the reporter and he starts writing again.
He asks "How does 'Auburn Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack' sound?"
"I'm not an Auburn fan either," the boy says.
"Oh, I thought everyone in Alabama was either for the Tide or the Tigers. What team do you root for?" the reporter asks.
"I'm just here in Alabama visiting my cousin, I'm a Tennessee Vols fan," said the boy.
The reporter smiles, starts a new sheet in his notebook, and writes: "Little Redneck From Tennessee Kills Beloved Family Pet."
************************
A seven-year old boy was at the center of a Knox County courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible.
The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him.
After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.
After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the Child Welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the University of Tennessee Volunteer football team, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.